Monday, November 24, 2008

Going to Step on Toes -- Enter Soapbox

I was at the doctor a couple of weeks ago (for an eye infection; it's gone now) and ran into my neighbor/friend/ward member. She and I really get along well, and she has been a great support during some rather difficult times. She's a single mom and her ex treated her rather like my ex did. So we got to talking about how things were going for her, and she mentioned that her ex has roommates, and had recently rented a room to a gay man! She was horrified because he hadn't told her before she dropped off her son for his weekend visit with dad, and she doesn't want her son "in that kind of environment."

Honestly, I was shocked. She has been so open and accepting of the mental health issues we have in our marriage and has talked me through some things, and she's just such a loving person, I couldn't imagine that sort of attitude from her.

Gay marriage, prop 8, and the church's stance notwithstanding, the brehren have never said "being gay is synonymous with being a predator/pedophile." In fact, the brethren have stated from the pulpit many times that gays are our brothers and sisters and we should treat them with kindness and love. Of course, this same friend was shocked beyond belief that sex was being discussed amongst 3rd and 4th graders at our elementary school and that there were pregnant 6th graders last year, but hadn't heard anything until *I* brought it up.

I'm not saying that it doesn't bring up sticky issues and hard topics of discussion with your children, but oh my stars, you have to have those conversations *anyway*. You have to teach them *anyway*. You have to be open with them *anyway*.

We had gay neighbors a few moves ago. They were some of the sweetest people I met in that area. One of my friends from my teen years is/was gay (and a cross dresser, although the last time I saw him, he was dressed as a man in a business suit and had lost the fake fingernails and eyelashes). He is also a lovely person and I rather miss his open, loving kindness as we lost touch long ago. I'm sure there are rotten gays, but there are also rotten straights, and you have to teach your kids correct principles of behavior in all aspects, not just what we believe to be right as far as sexual orientation is concerned.

I guess what I'm saying is that loving the sinner and hating the sin is far from where a lot of church members are these days where gays are concerned, even if that's where the Savior taught us to be about everyone. I have had to take a step back and go, "okay, she's still my friend," even if that attitude is there. So I'm guilty too, but in the opposite extreme.

My sweet baby just woke up, guess I'm done for now.

1 comment:

Katz said...

I can only say one thing, really.

Ignorance at it's finest.

I'll leave it at that.