Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Something Sad

Kiddo told me last night that a kid she knows indicated that their step-father is abusive to them when mom isn't around and that they are afraid to go home when he's there and mom isn't.

We talked about it for a bit and she said she'd told the person to tell their mom, but the child is afraid to because they think they'll get beaten more. The sad thing is, the kid could be right.

I'm not close to this person and, in fact, have always thought they are sort of a twit. One example: The kid once told my daughter there was something wrong with ME because I don't let kiddo walk alone to and from the bus stop 1/2 mile from our house. You bet I'm paranoid about kidnappers and other creeps. There are registered sex offenders everywhere, and many more who just haven't been caught yet. So, I'm protective. That's part of my job as a mother. Another example: The kid told my daughter that no one likes her and everyone just feels sorry for her. Honestly, I think that's a bit of projection.

Even though I may have thought this kid is a twit, NO ONE deserves to be abused. And perhaps that abuse is why they behave the way they do.

I've done the right thing; I know I have. It just really depresses me. More and more stories of step-parents and/or parents abusing their children are coming to light, and it makes me cry.

The last time I had to do the right thing, I'd witnessed the abuse and reported it. Investigators questioned the young teen and they denied it had ever happened. I know they didn't want their parent in trouble, but abuse is NEVER okay.

After a lot of thought, I realized something else: I'm so thankful my daughter knew enough to tell the kid what the first step should be, and that when they refused, that kiddo trusted me enough to come forward and tell me what's going on. She knows abuse is wrong and is very worried about this child, and is thankful we did the right thing. We also discussed not telling the kid that it was us so we could protect them AND my daughter as best possible. And I hope and pray that my daughter keeps her head on straight and avoids abusers in every way, shape, and form as she gets older and develops deeper relationships.


musicmom said...

What a sad, sensitive situation. I feel so bad for kids that find themselves in that situation. I hope the girl with follow through and tell her mom and/or teacher. She shouldn't ever be scared to be in her own home.

What a great mom you are. It is good your relationship with your daughter is such that she can come to you.

Kristina P. said...

I used to work for DCFS and I work now in a place where I have to call CPS probably weekly. You did the right thing. I hope that kid is safe.

SRA said...

Did you report the abuse? I don't see it explicitly stated in the entry, but I'm assuming that's what you did, which is a great thing. I very much believe that we must do all we can to see a situation through and not turn a blind eye or refuse to pursue a possible avenue of resolution to a problem.

stewbert said...

Thanks all. I hope they are safe, too, Kristina.

Yes, SRA, I did report it. I'm hoping she's honest about what happens in her home with the social worker. they're planning to visit her at school.

The Boob Nazi said...

Man, I'm sorry. That is a terrible situation to be in!