Drat!

My internet just pooped out. I thought for sure I'd get to log off and go to bed, which is all I've wanted to do today. This baby is sucking all my energy and brain away from me. It'll be worth it in the long run, but I forgot to go to the bank today so I could pay bills. Um, hello??

I've been sleeping a lot today and just haven't felt well -- I'm to the worst part of my morning sickness, and it'll just keep getting worse for 2 or 3 more weeks. The medication they give me so I'm not *as* sick makes me super sleepy, which is nice on the one hand because I can sleep through the worst of it, but bad on the other. I was only awake for about 6 hours today until time to get ready for work, and most of those 6 hours were spent in the car with DisGrace and Dizzy and Little Mister, lunching and erranding.

At any rate, I really don't feel well tonight, and usually when the internet poops out around now, I just end up having to log off for the night because our podunk internet company doesn't really have 24/7 service. I did what they always tell me to do (which never works) and rebooted the hub.

The darn internet came back on immediately.

This on top of a holiday weekend where I didn't once run out of work??? SO weird.

I usually gripe when I don't have work or can't, but I've been so tired lately, all I want to do is sleeeeeeeeeeeeep. On the one hand, it's too bad this hasn't been a normal holiday weekend for my line of work -- I'd be in bed right now. On the other, it's good for our family's budget if I can keep working. Guess I'll stop whining and get to editing more stuff.

Welcome, Welcome, Sunday Morning

The husband had to work yesterday daytime instead of last night (I don't know why they're messing with his sleep so bad ...), so he got to go to church today.

But first, he decided to cut his own hair. He needed it -- he was a bit shaggy. I helped trim around the edges and really should make him let me even it out a bit on top, but he's happy, he went to church, he even wrestled Little Mister during Sacrament meeting so I could listen. I'm not going to make waves.

Anyway. The last few weeks at church, Little Mister has gone up to any man wearing a suit or white shirt and tie and asked to be held. When Daddy came out of our bedroom, having shaved his beard and cut his hair, wearing a white shirt and tie, Little Mister *ran* for him and asked to be held. When we were walking from the car to the church (hush, I know the church is right next to the development, but we live in the back), Little Mister insisted on Daddy carrying him, and kept turning around to look at Daddy. He had to sit on his lap during Sacrament meeting, too, and wouldn't let Daddy out of his sight. It was SO cute.

After Daddy left after Sacrament meeting (he has to work tonight so needed more sleep), Little Mister didn't ask random strangers to hold him. YES!

*whine*

Um, this might be a TMI sort of post.

Ever since giving birth to my son, my sacrum and coccyx have caused me indescribable pain. Doctors and therapists have all supposed that it's the sacroiliac joint, but it's not: This is in between there, in the bone right in the middle, y'know, where Little Mister's head scraped down as he was being borned!!

My mommy sent me this wonderful pillow a long time ago which does help because it takes the pressure off the area.

But for some reason, I'm in excruciating pain tonight. I hope this isn't an omen for the rest of THIS pregnancy. Maybe I cooked too much yesterday or something.

Speaking of cooking, Little Mister has watched me measure and pour many things the last two days. (if you're my FB friend, sorry for the repeat). He went over to the pantry today and got out a plastic measuring cup and syrup, then walked to the living room. He sat on the floor and started trying to open the syrup. I'm thinking he was going to "measure" it out. And then probably drink it. We did manage to rescue the newly cleaned carpets from his determination, and he didn't even freak out too much. Yay.

Oh yay, I just got some work downloaded. Wahoo.

Gratitude

A lot of people on FB have been posting one thing they're grateful for every day this month.

I'm a cheater and doing all 30 at once. Mostly because a friend of mine had this posted as her facebook status the other day.

"Today I'm thankful that hubby and I are still employed. I know a lot of people right now who have lost their jobs, vehicles, and homes. So, no matter how much I may complain, I really am quite thankful."

And I realized I need to be more thankful and show that gratitude.

1. I, too, am thankful the husband and I are both still employed and we still have a home, a car that runs, and food on the table. All of our needs are met.
2. The Gospel. I'm thankful for our Savior, the Atonement, the restoration of the Priesthood, the Book of Mormon, temple covenants, etc.
3. My husband. He's not perfect, but neither am I. But we keep working through our problems and growing closer as a couple. Plus he bought me a steak and egg bagel for breakfast from McDonald's the other day when I really, really *needed* one.
4. My daughter. She's been very helpful lately and not complaining too much. She's made dinner a lot and is doing the dishes and laundry a lot, too. She comes home from school and plays with her brother and reads to him and has dance parties with him, and it really helps so I can rest when I need to. It's not her fault I'm pregnant, but she's sure pitching in and helping out! She also tells me silly stories and sings a lot and makes me laugh.
5. My son. He makes me smile every single day. He jabbers a lot in baby gibberish. He loves music and will point at the radio for us to turn it on so he can dance. He does silly and cute things that make us all laugh, like crawling around in circles and growling, or chasing Daddy through the house, or grabbing Kiddo's hand and holding it when she walks by while he's nursing ... He cuddles when he's sleepy and is sleeping in his crib for about 9 hours a night now, then sleeps with me a few more. So nice.
6. My step-daughter. She's been sending me little messages on MySpace, so I feel more connected to her than I have for a long time.
7. My parents. I'm not all that close to my dad, but my mom sure keeps me grounded. And not in the way she threatened when I was a teenogre.
8. My siblings and all the in-laws and extended family. I'm closer to some than others, but really do love them all and am thankful for their love and support.
9. My nieces and nephews on both sides. It's cute when one of them calls you to say hi, or when one calls your daughter to "chat". It's great to have friends in your family.
10. Washer, dryer, dishwasher, stove, microwave, refrigerator, vacuum ... all the lovely appliances we have today that make our lives easier.
11. Computers. They let me work from home and connect with friends, old and new, near and far, in various ways on the internet.
12. Drugs. Phenergan and hubby's psych meds, specifically.
13. Puffs Plus. In the early stages of pregnancy, I'm more congested, and since my baby shares everything with me, his cold and runny nose is now mine. Awesome. Puffs Plus save my nose.
14. Learning to coupon the last couple months. It has been a HUGE blessing. I'm spending less $ on groceries and have more food and other necessities (TP, Puffs ...) in the house. And I spent the same last weekend that I used to around Thanksgiving, but I got more stuff. lol.
15. The baby coming. This pregnancy was a surprise, but I'm excited for a new addition. Now we just need to sell the condo, find a rental, and get a minivan ...
16. Pudding. So weird because I'm sensitive to milk, but it's been settling my pregnant tummy. Go figure that one out.
17. Frozen pizza. Went to the store late last night, so I got home right at dinner time. But Freschetta was on sale and we had coupons, so I managed to make two for about $5.50, which is less than half what I would've spent at Little Caesar's, which is where I was tempted to go for dinner.
18. Music. I played a lot of different music growing up, in various different band, orchestra, and choir groups, and miss it a lot. I have this little boy who LOVES music and starts dancing whenever he hears it, and that makes me smile.
19. Light bulbs. The world would be a dimmer place without them.
20. Friends in the ward who host meetings while their kids are away, who don't mind that my snotty nosed baby swipes their baby's toys and sneeze on them, just say, "I'll wash them before the baby gets home." Awesome.
21. Apples, clementines, grapes ... all things fruit I can stomach right now.
22. Crafting with my Kiddo. We "got" to make some things last weekend to sell in her school's Christmas store next month after Little Mister went to bed.
23. Babywearing. I loved wearing Little Mister and am sure I'll be wearing this new baby a lot while I chase after a rambunctious 2-year-old.
24. Cookies. Red Vines. Basically anything sweet right now. (we think this baby is a girl because of this. oh, and meat makes me sick. just like with Kiddo, and just opposite from Little Mister.)
25. The husband waking up after two short hours of sleep the other day because Little Mister started shrieking while I was in the bathroom. His sister got too close to him right after he woke up from his nap. haha. Anyway. The husband calmed him down and handed him to me, then waited to make sure we were all okay before sneaking back to bed. Thank you, husband!
26. Sewing machines and cameras and yarn and knitting needles and crochet hooks and other artsy things that help me be creative.
27. Being busy. I don't love having too much on my plate, but I'd rather be busy and have stuff to do than not and be bored.
28. Getting half the child support refunded every month. Cali has done something screwy and is double garnishing the husband, so we've been getting multiple checks back every month, after he hits his $ obligation. Makes me less bitter about trying to save money. lol.
29. Good friends. You know the kind you can go weeks without talking to, but not because of a fight or anything, so when you do talk it seems like no time has passed at all.
30. Hot showers and baths, running water, plumbing, etc. Man ... I need a shower. I think I'll go take one!

I gave in.

I'm ashamed to admit it, but I gave in to the manipulation. When kiddo screamed, "You HATE me!" yet again, for the 5000th time today (slight exaggeration), I yelled right back. "You're right, I DO hate you!" She looked shocked. Thankfully. I said a couple of other things about how I don't really hate her, but don't like the behavior, and she left for a minute. When she came back, I also told her that when she accuses me of hating her, it hurts my heart and makes me cry and that I could never hate her. We talked about how you can like someone and not their behavior, and she said she has a boy in her class like that *to whom she has almost said the same thing I did to her!* so I know she knows the difference between loving someone and not loving their behavior.

At any rate, it was a bad night. Things just keep escalating. I don't know what to do with her, though I am trying.

And apparently it put me on edge because, though I usually try to avoid contention, debates, and confrontation, I got into a heated debate with a friend's friend on Facebook about universal health care, in which he may or may not have said Native Americans expect handouts from the government and in which I may or may not have called him and most white people "vanilla" and racist. Um ... I'm mostly white. lol

I need to finish work. Little Mister woke up, cried, and choked, and then I heard silence, so I had to check on him. He was fine, just settling down to sleep again, but I woke him right up. He's now awake watching Cars, so I have a good 15 minutes. Whee.

What a cutie

As we were leaving the school yesterday, my son in the stroller, my daughter walking beside me, and me on the phone with my dad, we came upon a little boy standing on the sidewalk whose mom was trying to get him and his sibling in a van. He was a cute kid. Then he stuck his hand out in front of him, looked at my son and yelled, "Stop!!!" Two or three times. So I did. I wasn't worried as to why he needed us to stop; he just looked kind of worried I'd run over him or get in his space. After he was sure we weren't going to hit him, he took his time and got in the van. I wasn't bothered or hassled by this -- we weren't in a hurry and all kids have their quirks.

His mom looked a bit frazzled and embarrassed and felt the need to apologize and explain. "Sorry! Autism."

I said, "Oh, he's just fine!"

Now, I've been thinking about it since we got to our car and got in. I could tell someone somewhere along the way hasn't been very understanding, maybe multiple someones. And I'm wishing I'd stopped and said, "Hang on," to my dad, so I could give her a hug and tell her what a good job she was doing.

So if you're the parent, caregiver, or loved one of a special needs child, consider this my virtual hug to you. You are doing an amazing job with your babies, doing one of the hardest jobs in the world. You have my admiration and respect, but more importantly, the love of your child.

Being sick blows

Except for one thing:

I caught up on google reader.

Some things I skimmed, others I read in full, others I read the most recent few entries and commented on them, then clicked "Mark all as read."

It's like having a clean living room or something.

Which I also have, thanks to the guy who cleaned my carpets this morning. If anyone in my area needs their carpets cleaned, lemme know. He was on-time, fast, got out all our stains (and didn't charge extra), and professional (and didn't comment on the disaster that exists in my kitchen!). Not to mention VERY affordable.

Now that I'm feeling somewhat better, I'm off to try making the husband some dinner before work, AND some pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. Let's hope I don't accidentally throw the pumpkin into his scallop stir fry. He would not be pleased.